Being the “Hang-Out” House

I’ve been called “over protective” and it’s never hurt my feelings. My kids have been called “nerdy” a time or two and I take it as a complement. I’m not trying to raise the “cool” kid here. I’m trying to raise kids that are secure and proud of themselves. It’s not easy, and I sure don’t have a fool-proof plan I’m working from.  Most days I founder around praying that I’m not going to mess this up. Some days I feel that it’s too late…they have many sessions of therapy talking about me in the future. There are days though,  that I look at them and find myself feeling that I must be doing something right. These are the days any Mom lives for. 

I had one of those days when it hit me that my son’s friends enjoy coming to our house. We have a modest and messy house. We do have an awesome yard and we have worked hard to make our basement “fun”.  I have never liked my kids going to someone else’s house unless we really knew them. I’m not even thrilled with them going to cousin’s houses when they can end up who-knows where.  I’m not going to rant here, but there have been a good number of times when my son is nowhere to be found because they wondered off to someone else’s house who is a stranger to me. He was 9. I’m sorry…but I find that very upsetting. If I let my kid go to your house I expect them to be there and under your watchful eye. 

I love that they invite people to our home. I can get to know the kids they are hanging out with better and it always helps to see my own child when he’s with his peers. I also get to hear all the gossip from the kids talking and take mental notes of who I may not want my kids to hang out with in the future. It pays to know some things. I would have never known about the recent drug bust in the middle school if it wasn’t for the gossip around the chip bowl. There have been times when I’ve felt the need to influence a friendship one way or another. Is that controlling? Maybe, but you know what? That’s my job. 

I’d rather have a house full of kids and supply them with snacks and entertainment and know they are safe. I let them play, but I take the responsibility for other parents’ kids very seriously. It becomes my complete duty to make sure that they don’t get hurt. I do let them climb trees..and that makes me crazy nervous..but we all know we have to let them be kids. Buying an Air Hockey Table and a big TV for the basement is a small price to pay for my piece of mind. I believe with all my heart that keeping my kids close will help ensure at least a measure of parenting success. So, yes, I’m over protective. 

                              

How NOT to Sell Insurance

Have you ever had that call come just as you were putting dinner on the table? Maybe when the kids were in the bath tub...or say at nine o'clock at night when frankly, no one except an emergency should be calling. I was raised with the manners to never call anyone after 8:00 P.M. and never before 8:00 A.M.. I know there are exceptions and having family across the country we disregard that rule. Times have changed a bit, but you just don't expect, nor want, a sales call coming in while the kids are sleeping. I make myself laugh at how "old" I sound sometimes. "Back in my day...we didn't call after 8 or say 'yea' to an adult." Don't get me going there......

OK, I did ask for this call at first. However, bad manners followed. After my son's father was killed in a hit-and-run by a drunk driver this September I've been a bit of a mess. Not only was he one of my very best friends for the past 15 years but we were raising my son together, though in separate homes. One of those things you don't want to think about after such heartbreak is money. He was a budding entrepreneur which translates to not having life insurance. Thankfully my husband is blessed enough to have a good career. However, as a stay-at-home wife and Mom I have no income. We get by because we don't have any daycare or before and after school care to pay for and well...I do everything.

There is a financial value to that that would need to be replaced. So, I've been sad. I still cry a lot. I drink a bit of wine when I'm alone at night. I've been going through panic having the reality of how things can change in less than a second. I've been basically going crazy some days. I have to admit, I'm the not the insurance type since I pretty much don't feel like I have any of my own money to spend on it. In one of my moments I requested information. Yes, I am getting myself life insurance. I would be expensive to replace and I would want to feel like I could still be in some way taking care of my family. That being said I'm not going to jump right in to whomever tells me to buy their policy.

Here comes my ranting...(.as if I wasn't doing that all ready). This guy from AIG called me back a few days later. I was running one of the kids to one activity or another and my husband gave him my basic info but told him when I'd be home. He set a time to call me before we put the girls to bed. 8:00 P.M. He called at 8:45..What????? Really? Is it me or should I have put down "Three Billy Goats Gruff" and went running to the phone? He was told to call back the next day.

A week later he called again when I was running out the door to one activity or another...4 kids mind you keep you moving. He set a time to call. I am home all day most days. It's not like I'm that hard to get a hold of as long as it's not during after school activities. So, he was asked to call back. "So sorry I'm being difficult" I nicely tell him.

Another week later he calls at night. "Hey, this is Patrick" Who? "Your AIG director" Huh? A month or more has passed since I've requested a quote....one my computer said was going to email me immediately. I just wanted to know a ball park figure so I can start comparing. He was so familiar with me that I felt it was rude. We're not long time pals. You expect me to remember your voice?

I was very pleasant..because I can be nice sometimes:) I did say that I had expected to hear from him a long time ago when I was told to wait for his call. He set the times...then never called. I told him that I was no longer going to worry about it. He said "Well I won't worry about it either then" in a very snotty tone. Snotty....I have a teenager..I KNOW snotty..and that was snotty. Now, I don't know anything about AIG and I don't really have complaints about a company I don't know...and was unable to even hear anything about. However, I can tell you that I am finding my insurance someplace else.

Is it me, or have we lost our basic manners in our business affairs? "Back in my day......."

I'm done now:)

Kids...cleaning

This blog was just what I've been looking for! I'm sure my boys aren't the only ones who spend more time complaining about chores than doing them.

This site was wonderful so I had to share.

Chores for Kids: A Guide to Cleaning with Kids 

http://frugalfun4boys.com/2013/02/10/chores-for-kids-a-guide-to-cleaning-with-kids-by-room-and-age/


I have tried chore charts and I have to admit I let them go for a while and I wish I was more organized. I think I lost them actually....it's true. I'm going to use this advice and create a new plan. With 2 boys, 2 girls, 2 dogs, and 2 cats....I just really really can't keep this place clean on my own.



I'm open to any advice anyone wants to share with me....really...HELP.

Counting with Crafts

This was a lesson in number recognition for my 4 year old and a counting tool for my 3 year old. We "play school" in our craft studio and always use our crafting tools for everything...in part because they are everywhere. (I'm always working on my organization)

 It takes no time to prepare and I keep this on our school shelf with the basket of jacks for our "free choice" time. Once they understand what the tool is for they can go  back to it whenever they want. We like pink in our house if you can't guess, so I simply used a ruler to grid out 12 columns. We are working on 1-12, some use 0-10. My Moon Princess was getting stuck with the "eleventeen" and skipping 12 for a little while until she was able to really see them written in this concrete way. Numbers are very abstract and they really do need to see them in this way to connect the number and the quantity.

 

MP places which ever objects she chooses to equal the number at the top of the column. Sometimes you have to smooch them in when you use bigger objects.  I allow her to do this completely on her own and it takes some re-counting....which simple means reenforcing on her part. At first you can have them go in order and they can see how each column has one more object than the last. Once they are secure in this you can have them work backwards, learn even / odd numbers, ask for only specific numbers, or count by 3's or 4's. This becomes a game and with simply a sheet of paper and some odds and ends you have a very complete lesson and a lot of fun.

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 My 3 year old focuses more on the counting of the objects for each column once her sister sets it up for her. One thing I am careful about is keeping tools like this only on the lesson shelf. It's important to learn respect for these things and I believe that leads to them placing a higher value on education. 

 At the end of each play school we enjoy free art time. We love water colors!

Really....you expect me to smile?

Puffy Paint

Materials needed:

closeable plastic baggies - one for each color
Into each bag put -
 - 1/2 cup flour
- 2 tsp baking powder
- 2 tsp salt
- 1/2 cup water with more on hand to reach desired texture
- food coloring
- card stock.  The moisture makes paper curl..so cardboard would be great. 

 Half the fun with the puffy paint was making it.

Just snip off the corner and squeeze into the bottle....no mess! I bought these off of Amazon for about $3 but I am going to remember to save our mustard bottles from now on.

 I always have their old cookie sheets ready to go. We do most crafts on these and they are so easy to clean no mater what kind of project you are doing. (I keep their play-dough in a plastic container on them and leave it sitting on the table all the time. Great for when I'm making lunch! )

 Keep the constancy thin enough to come out easily but thick enough to keep it's shape. I had to add water after a while.

Beautiful Artist

Yes, it's safe to eat......

I found this through a picture on Google images and checked out a number of recipes. I never have self-raising flour or shaving cream so I felt discouraged. I really try to make our crafts out of stuff I have around the house otherwise I'm afraid of going down that slippery slope of supporting our craft habit. I'm sure some of you can relate:)

I found these directions and voila...I knew this was the one. This is from Tried and True (click on the link)  There are all kinds of great ideas on her site!


Some tips:

Our paint thickened up as we went....we played with them for a while. If this happens just add more water and shake really well. I also had a hard time with clogs. You'll want to make sure it's mixed up really well and you might have to rinse out the top a few times. My youngest had some problems with it a while before I realized it was partially clogged.

 I opened the microwave to find my towel and my daughters picture had brown burn marks. That was the last time I set the time to 1 minute! Some microwaves are stronger, so keep an eye on your work. I highly recommend drying the pictures in short bursts so you can keep an eye on it. I did 30 seconds at a time and stopped as soon as it was dry enough. Warning though...it must be dry "enough" or you may find some mold at a later date. We don't tend to keep stuff we make for very long...or we would be surrounded!

 Keep your water glass away from a thirsty kitten.....he has his own water but ours must taste better. He even tries to steal my tea!

Francis our dog-cat.<3

Ranting About Waiting

I've read that it's not good to hold your anger in. It can actually shorten your life. So, this is strictly for my own health. When I take my child to the doctor I am always 15 minutes early to make sure they have all the paperwork needed. I also have things filled out before hand and pre-register when possible.

We had a 2:15 appoint. We were there at 2:00 with paperwork in hand. At 2:45 someone came out and checked my sons eyes. This took a few minutes and simply checked with the eye chart and for color blindness. Nothing we really needed, but fine, it's part of seeing the ophthalmologist.  We were then taken back to the waiting room to wait. I always ask how long it will be because with 4 kids I always have to be somewhere. I can't be late getting home for my youngest son to get off the bus. She kindly informed us it would be about 45 minutes before the doctor would see us. I kindly informed her that we had a 2:15 appoint. They then told us that any time we go there we need to expect to be there for 2 hours.

WHAT?? 2 hours to wait to see the doctor?? Why not just set the appointments so everyone doesn't have to wait 2 hours? That sounds logical to me. I told her that we would have to reschedule but she made it clear that everyone just needs to know that they will have to wait that amount of time because he sees 80 people a day. Granted, we live in an area that just doesn't have much and there is a huge concentration of older people. (the young people have all moved away...like 2/3 of the people that used to live in central New York are now gone)  Still....there are other ophthalmologist in the area.You can be assured that we will find one and tell everyone I know not to go to this place!

It's not just the waiting and clear sign of total disrespect for the patients time but the waiting room as well as the examining room were FULL of posters and pamphlets for Botox and braces. Why?? The whole set up was just really insulting. Clearly these are not doctors we are dealing with but simply businessmen who spent a little more time in school. I was waiting for a used car to be for sale in the waiting room.

I can't say if the doctors were any good or not because I'm not going to be so insulted as to expect to wait for 2 hours when appointments could clearly be set up better. I can say though that none of us will ever go to that eye physicians office on Ellinwood Drive!

Ok, I'm done. I feel better.

Do you blame me? Would you wait 2 hours?

Muffin pan crayons

The finished crayons

 These have all ready been used in hours of pretend play...none of which included actual coloring.

I didn't shave the old crayons...I just cut and let the girls sort them how they wanted.

 

 

We made these up while we were waiting for cookies to come out of the oven. I'm cheap..I mean thrifty smart.. and didn't want to run the oven without another use. I had the oven set at 350 degrees and stuck these in as soon as I took the cookies out. I just watched them, so I don't have a set time to tell you.

One thing I will say about how they came out is that we needed to sand the smooth side a bit to color. There was residue from the non-stick spray I used. I'm guessing you could do it without the spray, but the directions that I remember called for it. My girls mostly like these for "jewels" but we will also be using them for plastic leaf rubbings later this week.

This is the new smile face:)

Innocent Looks

"Gypsy the Innocent"

Gypsy's new friend

There isn't much that needs said about that.....she's perfect and we have all fallen in love with her completely...we just keep the vinegar spray at the ready. Really, we've done great. We've had many accident free days and the end of mistakes is right around the corner...I just know it:)

Welcome Home Gypsy

Meet our newest family member, Gypsy. She's a Miniature American Shepard...aka Miniature Australian Shepard. She's perfect! My husband loves to do his research. I'm not going to say that he's obsessive...no, I won't say that...but seeing my sweet husband staying up late night after night on the computer looking at puppy pictures makes me love him more.

We were very particular in what we were looking for. Finding the right puppy for your family is very serious business. We have been thinking about this for months. My 9 year old son is a bit on the hyper side and his older brother is NOT. My daughters are a bit young to play the way Anthony wants to play...and, well, he's a boy. We needed a dog he could play fetch and Frisbee with in the back yard. We needed a dog that would have the energy to keep up with him. That was the first criteria.

Secondly, we have been wanting to get really involved in Agility Training ever since we went to a show and met the dogs and their people. We have training courses close by until we build our own. I am going to train Cricket my Coton - Zhu, but she isn't what you would consider high-energy. She is a companion dog and has been calm and easy from the day we brought her home. She's great at tricks and being by my side 24/7. She's more of a 1 person dog...mine:)

We also didn't want a dog that would be so big they would knock the girls over. I've had a Lab and they are wonderful, but they would be a bit big for my 3 and 4 year old girls. We do have a little bit of land for running, but we didn't want a big runner. We also didn't want a hunting dog that would be apt to run off on the scent of something. My husband has had Beagles. They are loving and sweet but once they want to chase they tend to go. Hunting dogs and gun dogs were out.

Next, our chickens and cats. I LOVE Terriers. They are fun and loving and crazy smart. They are also amazing killers when they want to be. Of course Cricket is also and she's not a Terrier. She can find and kill a mouse before the cats have a chance. She is great with the chickens though. I read too much about most Terriers having a hard time being part of the chicken and cat family.

link to when Gypsy meets the chickens on Yellow Hen House

 We don't mind the grooming, in fact we like it. My husband sits with Cricket every night and we found a great local groomer to take her to for the bells and whistles. That opened up more choices for us.

Back to the chickens for a second...if you read my blog and have ever seen my other blog Yellow Hen House then you know I LOVE my chickens.  My Dad has Border Collies and he bought them sheep. Australian Shepherds are also herding dogs that will round up the chickens. Voila...perfect match.

Why we found the Miniature Australian Shephards to be a perfect match for our family:

Great with the family and other pets including chickens.
Will play ball and Frisbee with my son - a LOT
The breed is on the top 5 of Agility Course Champions
Very Smart so we can start Obedience Training in a few weeks.
We love the herding type dogs like my Father's.
The mini size is perfect for us and won't take up the whole sofa
I'm home all day with the girls so she will get lots and lots of attention to be well trained.
The breed is healthy - (this knocked out a few other breeds that were in the running.)
Last but not least....look at that face!!!! Pure love!!

Just Praying for the Families

I never really speak of religion as I believe it is a private matter and we all have the freedom to believe in what works for each of us. However, it is in times like this when we see the news reports coming out of Newtown that we all go inside ourselves to our own faith.

We pray, we hold our own children closer, and we cry for those who have had their lives ripped apart by evil. But mostly, we must pray for love and healing. I've held my children and we have cried. We discussed our faith in being eternally connected to the universe and to each other. We hope that our tears, our pain that we feel for the families will help lessen the burden on their hearts. We pray that our love and hopes for their strength will help support them through this time. There are no other words except that the world shares in the loss and the pain.